Looking back over my life, I realise that when we come into this world we have a natural instinct to give and receive love. We’re taught how to hate.
As we grow we’re influenced by others. Be they parents, family, friends, teachers or society, we start to change. We begin thinking maybe they’re right and we’re wrong.
We learn to compete with others. We experience negativity, guilt, shame, loss and death as being normal. We also learn that doing well at school, being good enough, having a good job and enough money is ‘the right way’. And, that they’re more important than love. The message we’re bombarded with is that we’re not quite good enough the way we are. We’re taught to learn from others’ experiences rather than encouraged to have our own.
Soon enough, we enter the adult world where things are valued more than people. We all know this to be true.
Yet somehow we’re always seeking a way out of this mindset. That child who naturally wanted to love has been forgotten but not lost and it feels trapped. So we seek to change our jobs, partners, homes, counsellors. We think that if we lose weight or change the colour of our hair things might magically improve.
All of these remedies are just Band-Aids. If real discontent sets in, we begin to sabotage everything: our careers, our relationships. We drink, gamble, take drugs and withdraw from life. Or, we obsess over our appearance and exercise compulsively. We fret, worry, agonise, and create drama where there need be none. All the while we’re worrying about the past and future and missing out on the present. It is passing us by.
Perpetually changing your circumstances is like giving your life a new coat of paint. Looks nice for a while but makes no lasting difference to the house. Only renovations from within will bring peace. This is one of the reasons we all love holidays and travelling so much – it’s an escape. I used to often say, “I’d like to go on a holiday but for the fact that I’d have to take me with me.”
All of this angst, anxiety, guilt and irrational thinking can do the most awful things to your mind and body.
There comes a point during your life when your mind and your body will say enough is enough. And if you don’t listen – watch out!
Out of sheer exhaustion, your mind and body will look for ways out.
Everyone goes through stages in their life when they feel caught between two worlds.
Soon enough it can feel like the sun has gone behind the clouds. It has become all too much. Some might start to feel that it’s too hard to be them any longer. You start to feel that you’re a burden to your friends and family because you just can’t find the happy person you once were.
Something has to change. But it must come from within. You need to rediscover that child. The one who hadn’t yet been beaten about the head with the world’s negativity. Because the sun always shines above the clouds.
After two nervous breakdowns, a heart attack and hysterectomy – I revaluated my life. And I realised that it was just that, MY life. So I took it back. And you can too. It takes some time to unlearn all of the horrid things the world has taught you to feel, but it can be done. And take it from me, it’s worth it.
For more inspirational messages from real life readings, grab a copy of Marion’s book Caught Between Two Worlds today!