How do you know if a loved one in Spirit is trying to contact you? Here are 16 signs you shouldn’t ignore.

16 Signs a Loved One in Spirit Is Trying to Contact You

Losing a loved one, whether you are ready or not, is one of the hardest things you and they will ever go through in this lifetime. No one can truly prepare you for having a loved one in spirit. No one.

When you first lose a loved one, or even as you prepare for their passing, both of you will experience a whirlwind of emotions.

One of the most important things I would like to share with you is this…

Please don’t be afraid.

After all, you and they have died before. Not once. Not twice. But many times.

Yes, this is the first time you will leave the body you inhabit in this lifetime. However, your Soul knows exactly what is happening. This is why so many people recount their loved one “passing away” with a smile on their face. They are often being reunited with family members, Soul family, Guides and even beloved pets who have come to help them transition Home.

You may never get over their loss after all grief is love with nowhere to go.  Please know that you will always carry them in your heart and this is where you will feel confirmation of them being back with you, albeit in a form different to what you expect. Reassure them also that you would love to know that they ‘have arrived safely’ which is the question most often asked of me about their loved one, once they have rested and recovered from this incarnation.

I write more about this in my article ‘What happens after we die?’

This IS Real.

The big question is WHY would they contact me?

The real reason is that it is easier for them to contact you then you to contact them…..or is it?

Let me explain, the only difference between you and your loved one is that you still have a body, for now. You have a mind and a brain and they are both very powerful instruments to be used in this life only. Your brain/mind will easily rationalise anything you are experiencing as being of this, our human world. Our brain is not ‘wired’ to communicate or know how to interpret messages from your loved ones or Guides, but your Soul/Spirit self does.

That’s why I don’t use my brain/mind to understand anything Spiritual. Why would I? To start with, my brain/mind is only as old as my body currently is, ie; 63. My Soul, however, is lifetimes old and it knows what is good and right for me and I trust it implicitly.

Over the many years I have been giving Readings, my Opa (Dutch Grandfather) and Team of Guides have taught me a fabulous way to help YOU identify what it is you are experiencing. I can teach you this also from wherever you are in the world via video link. It truly is amazing and I love watching people have a huge ‘Aha moment’ when they realise for themselves, that they have actually been experiencing contact with their loved ones and/or guides themselves some, for many years. However, because they got the pictures ie thoughts into their brain, they thought that they were just reminiscing or thinking of their loved one and a memory was brought up for them and that’s how they saw their loved one again.

No! That’s not how it works. The first thing we share/teach is how to switch your brain/mind off so that you can indeed be fully present when you get a message or visit from a loved one or guide in spirit. After all, why would you want to miss a visit?

The first thing I recommend is that you keep an open mind, a warm, welcoming heart, and a notebook and pen close by. You may be surprised by what you begin to notice.

Before we begin, I’d like to encourage you to read this article with an open mind and an open heart. You don’t have to believe everything you read. Simply ask yourself one question as you go… “Have I experienced this?”

They Want You to Know They’re Safe

One of the greatest gifts our loved ones in Spirit try to give us is reassurance.

In my experience, they don’t come back to frighten us. They come back because they can feel our sadness. They want us to know they are safe, that they are surrounded by love and that life continues beyond the physical world.

Many people imagine their loved one is suffering after death. Time and time again, through Readings, I have found the opposite.

Their message is often beautifully simple…

“Please don’t be so sad.”

“I’m alright.”

“There really is more to life than we realise.”

It’s All About Energy

In my two books, I explain a lot about energy. Many of you already understand how energy works. Let me explain it to you if it is a new concept. You see, we are all energy, dead or alive, makes no difference. Although it does indeed make a difference when it comes to getting visits from loved ones or guides. We still have a body and its energy is VERY heavy. Our loved ones and guides who are at ‘home’ as we call it, also known as the world beyond the veil, the world in between worlds, do not have a body and therefore are fully present in the beautiful light energy that is their Soul. The last thing they want to do is become ‘heavy’ again just so they can experience being with you, they got out of their body for a reason. So, that means, that it is up to you to raise your own energy into a similar, simpler, higher, loving frequency. (I’m not saying that you aren’t already, I’m just recommending that you think like a Spirit). Think of your Soul being as light as a feather, that’s how light you need to be in order to successfully make contact with them. You will also need confirmation that you need to definitely know that it is them you are communicating with. Too many ‘spirits’ like to play games with us humans and that is why we recommend that you have the talk about how you will know for sure that they are contacting you before they go home or pass away.

We are all energy, dead or alive makes no difference. We all ‘remember’ what someone felt like to us when we were with them when we were alive together. Our Loved Ones in particular will always touch you with their energy first. This is their ‘safe’ way of not scaring you. This is their way of letting you know that they are with you. So, if you answer yes to anything in the list below, this will be the reason why.

This ‘feeling’ they bring is one that is now their new normal. They discarded the heavy energy that was their body when they died. This feeling of comfort is just like receiving a hug from your loved one.

Firstly, let me share my experience with you as to why they would contact you.

Whilst you will never get to sit with them physically again, you certainly can Spiritually and I/we encourage you to.

In my experience, one of the most important things I can share with you is to let you expect the unexpected. This happens particularly through Readings I’ve given whereby, the human person sitting in front of me would dearly love to hear from their ‘xyz person’ and when another Soul/Spirit comes through, gives me their name as connection, the person in front of me often says ‘I don’t know that person or want to talk to that person.’ Quite often, it is this very visit that may just make all the difference in your life. It may be an explanation or an apology. It may be that things were left unsaid or undone and that for both sides there was a Spiritual Contract in place (see my article about Spiritual Contracts and video). It may just be an “I love you” that was never said. They are some of the reasons why they would contact you. It’s not about small talk, it’s about just a few words that will help heal you and them, so that you can both move forward on your Soul Journey.

Soul Family vs Blood Family – What’s the Difference – A Soul Contract?

Just another little important note I share here is that we have Soul Family and we have Blood Family. Soul Family, to clarify, are with you in every incarnation. Blood Family aren’t. What they are, however, are usually the ones we signed a Soul Contract with. They are the ones that will ‘play out’ the other role in your contract. Blood Family are only with you in one incarnation.

Mostly, it is Soul Family that come through as a visitor during a Reading or to you directly once the time is right.

What’s most important about any visitors you receive is that they all come with a ‘feeling or a knowing’ of when you know you know. The only way I can describe this feeling to you is remember how I felt whenever I was with them when they were alive.

Your loved ones will only contact you, not anyone else as in random strangers. Although, in saying that it has been shown to me by my Opa Guide, that loved ones don’t automatically gain access to you. They first need to understand and learn about energy as many die/pass away/ go home without this knowledge. They then practice this new awareness by ‘showing’ themselves to a stranger first. If this stranger acknowledges that they ‘have just seen a Spirit ie ‘them’ then they can know and their Guides can know that they are in fact ready to show themselves back to their family. They know this because of the acknowledgement given to them by the living person seeing them. Generally, your Loved One will get one chance to really show themselves to you clearly before they move on to their next stage in Soul development.

Why It’s Important to Have “The Talk” Before Your Loved One Goes Home

How would you feel if you ACTUALLY had a Loved One come and visit you?

Would you show fear to them?

How would you acknowledge them?

How would you feel say, the next day, the next week after your visit?

How would you feel telling family and friends about your visitor?

These are all really important questions to help you be ready for any visit you may receive at any time.

This is not about sensationalising when a visit occurs or ringing your local TV station with your ground breaking story. A visit from a loved one is very, VERY personal.

Whilst, they no longer have a body, they do have their Soul energy and it is this energy they will use to communicate with you.

If you are ever going through a very hard time and praying for a sign, please make sure that you stipulate exactly what kind of sign you want to see or what kind of help you want from them.

Our loved ones and Guides are more than happy to show you a sign, but it’s not up to them to make the sign. What if they chose the wrong one?

So, here is where I would like to share with you my experience of when Opa taught me this lesson during a Reading.

During a reading with a lady named Pam one day, I asked Pam where she would like to begin her session, this is how that session went:

“Marion, I keep asking for signs but I never get any. Please tell me why my loved ones won’t communicate with me? I’ve done nothing wrong and I miss them terribly.”

Whilst she was talking I chatted with Opa my Guide, telepathically about Pam’s situation asking him to show me through his visions the potential reason Pam wasn’t seeing any signs from Spirit.

Ah!!! Very interesting. Let me share the vision Opa showed me with you.

“Marion, my Opa said to me – Please share this information with anyone that is wanting to see signs from their loved ones and have been asking but not receiving. Ask Pam what kind of signs she has been asking for?”

So I did. “Pam, I said, please tell me what you ask for when you ask for a sign.”

Pam said “Oh, I just ask person ‘xyz’ to show me a sign to let me know they are around me and that they are ok now”

Aha I said “Pam, that is what I thought” and then I shared my vision with Pam and now with you.

“You see, our Guides are more than happy to show us signs IF they KNOW what you want to see. It’s a bit like this, when you go to your drive through take away food outlet, you don’t say “I would like a burger, fries and a drink” do you? If you did this, you would have a bunch of young people running around in the kitchen trying to work out what kind of burger and drink you want, so that when you drive up to the pick up window, your order will be there waiting for you to ‘see it.’ So, it’s always much better to specify what you want your Guides to show you, make it clear for them and for yourself, that way you can know for sure when they have shown you a sign’ PS Do the same with your food order at the drive through take away.

Pam agreed that this made perfect sense to her and thanked Opa and I for the messages.

Your Loved Ones and Team are more than happy to give you a confirmation sign. Please make it easy and clear for them so that you never miss a sign again. One of the most important things you can do is to continue your relationship with your loved one. Do not take the out of sight, out of mind mentality, that would hurt your relationship with them. I know a lot of you feel ‘silly’ talking to the air when you can’t actually see anyone. This is where the lesson of Trust comes into it. Talk to your loved ones and also your Guides often and make the time to talk to them, make a regular appointment time that is special for just the two of you and continue communicating. You will be glad you did.

The 16 Signs

Here are just some of the ways your loved one may get in touch with you. Take a read through the list and see if you have experienced them. If you haven’t, keep a journal and see whether they start happening.

1. Do you ever feel like you have someone in the room with you even if you know that you are completely alone?

One of the main questions I recommend you asking yourself is ‘am I comfortable with this energy I’m feeling?’ This is such an important question to keep you safe. In your human life you would never put yourself in a position where you do not feel safe, Spiritually you need to do the same. Always check if you have a Gatekeeper and if you are not sure, please reach out to me for a session together and I can help you. There is a very good chance that you DO have your loved one with you but your mind will try and talk sense into you…..don’t let it!

2. Do you ever find yourself swaying between a myriad of emotions including tears of sadness and tears of joy?

These can be a good indication that you are sensing your loved ones and or your Guides around you. 

3. Do you ever get goosebumps or ‘truth bumps’ for no apparent reason or that feeling of someone ‘walking over your grave?’

Oooo that is one of my most favourite signs and certainly gets my attention to try and find out who has come to visit.

4. Do you ever have loved ones come to visit you in your dreams?

Are your dreams in black and white ? Colour? Do people talk in your dreams? Do their lips move? Do you remember your dreams vividly?

If you’d like to learn more, I’ve written a full article about Dreams, click here to read.

The more lucid your dreams are the more likely they are to be from a visitor trying to deliver a message.  I recommend that you keep a dream journal as once we wake it can be very hard to remember any messages meant for us.

If you’d like to learn more about how our loved ones and Guides communicate with us through dreams, I’ve also recorded a YouTube video on this fascinating subject. Simply click below to watch.

5. Have you ever suddenly, at random found an object belonging to a loved one that has passed over?

The harder we look for something that is lost the further away it seems to be. This usually happens when we have lost something of sentimental value that belongs to our loved one. Stop trying so hard and ask your loved one to help you. You will, I know, be very pleasantly surprised. 

6. Do you hear them calling your name?

This actually takes a lot of energy for them to do so, this is why it is best to be as quiet and still as you can as it’s a good way to raise your energy / vibration / frequency to match theirs.

How many times are you absolutely certain that someone has called your name only to turn around and see no one beckoning you. That’s because it is someone in the spirit world trying to get a very important message through to you. It’s actually really hard for them to project their voice so you can hear with your external ears. Pay attention to everything happening in your life on every level and expect the unexpected, always. I do.

7. Do you find that your plans keep changing, or when you are driving that people keep cutting you off?

Say thank you! Just THANK YOU. Don’t get frustrated. There is no doubt in my mind that this is all happening for a very good reason. Mostly you will find out the reason why after the event, thank goodness.

8. Do you ever find that when you have been thinking of a loved one, the lights flicker on in the house or the TV goes on/off by itself?

I find this is more so when I am at a clients house doing a reading for them. Often, I don’t notice it until they point it out to me. This often happens when energies are out of alignment and your loved one or guide is struggling to get through to you. 

One Experience I’ll Never Forget

I remember one particular evening when I was standing at the kitchen bench preparing dinner. I’d done six readings that day and I was actually really tired. I had a friend at the time helping me prepare dinner.

We had the music on in the other room, however I found it too loud. I kept thinking to myself, “I need to go and turn down that music, it’s giving me a headache!” But I just kept making dinner because I was too tired to move.

Eventually, I asked my friend to turn it down, but it never got done.

I continued thinking, “Oh, I wish I wasn’t so dead on my feet so I could turn off the music.”

Suddenly, no word of a lie, the room went very cold and the music switched itself off while we were both still standing at the kitchen bench preparing dinner.

I’m not sure exactly who it was, but I was very grateful for the music being turned off. Thank you I thought to myself.

Experiences like this remind me that our loved ones and Team in Spirit are often much closer than we realise. They aren’t trying to frighten us—they’re simply finding gentle ways to let us know they’re with us.

9. Do you ever smell a distinct fragrance or scent around you when there’s no one around you at all or maybe you smell the cake that was your Grandma or Mum’s signature dish?

For me, I usually smell cigarette smoke when Opa is around. I smell it everywhere, even the bathroom, car, my caravan, my office, when I’m asleep. It’s a smell that I particularly don’t like but it’s also comforting as I know exactly who it belongs to and that I am being protected and guided.

10. Have you ever found yourself thinking of a loved one and suddenly you see their favourite butterfly, dragonfly, lady bird, willy wagtail bird staying around you and not going away?

So many people see these incidents as signs from their loved ones. Or should I say, someone’s loved ones. This is where it is vital that you make plans with your loved ones as to what their signs are before they go home or pass away. Then you will never have doubts again as most gardens are full of dragon flies and butterflies BUT when you have asked a particular colour butterfly to land on your hand at a particular time of day and day and not fly away and this is what you had asked your loved one to do, then, there’s your sign from your loved one right there and I bet you will always feel emotional and may even shed a tear as your heart will feel so full of love and confirmation.

I have a remarkable true story that I know you will love about a willy wagtail bird, that I will share with you in a separate article and link it here once it’s published.

11. Have you ever noticed street signs? Car registration plates or conversations that you overhear?

I would like to share this story with you as I believe it may help you understand what this is like for some people:

I had a lady named Kim ring me about 4 yeas ago. She wanted to talk about something that had happened to her after our session. “Maz, I need to share this with you as I would love to know what you make of it. About 6 months ago, I felt a breast lump under my arm. I said to myself ‘oh I better go and see Dr Roberts about this’ but then I told myself to stop being silly. Anyway, the following weekend I was running late for an afternoon because I wanted to stop into the supermarket and pick up some goodies to share. I thought I would take a short cut through the back streets but I got lost. I looked up at the sign and it said “Robertson Lane” I was going the wrong way. I turned around and started heading back the way I’d come when I was cut off by a speeding driver with a personalised number plate that said “ROBBIE” aaargh, he made me cranky. When I got to the supermarket, I was held up at the checkout by the staff member talking to a customer about her partner Rob.
Wait! What?
Robertson Way!

ROBBIE personalised number plate.

Check out lady talking about Rob.

Maz, Was this all coincidence or actually a sign from a loved one regarding my breast lump?

Could this all be related to my breast lump and my thought to see Dr Roberts?

I got back into my car and rang the Doctor’s surgery straight away and I asked if I could have the next available appointment with Dr Roberts. The receptionist said that she’d just hung up from a cancellation and if I came in straight away I would be seen straight away.

Lucky I did! Those 3 signs saved my life that day. The Doctor even said to me a couple of months later “I don’t know what brought you in that day but I’m glad you came in. We’ve been able to do a minor removal of the breast lump, however, if you had left it any longer we would have had to do a whole breast removal operation and then subject you to chemotherapy and radiotherapy.

I don’t know how my loved ones or guides did it, but they certainly got my attention with the three messages about Dr Roberts on that Saturday months ago. They saved my life.

Your loved ones and Guides may not give you the signs you want but they will give you the signs you need.

13. Does your pet cat or dog ever just stop and stare at one spot at something you cannot see? Can you feel what they are seeing? They may be your best barometer that you have a visitor

Our pets, cats and dogs can often be found fixated at a point on the ceiling. Does your pet do this? Because their Souls are simple and pure and have no minds to distort what they are sensing, cats and dogs are our best barometer that you have a visitor in your place. My dog, used to do it every day several times a day for up to 20 minutes or longer at a time. He would always cock his head from side to side as if he was listening to someone sharing wisdom with him. Someone that only he could see. If you see your pet behaving this way, take it that this is the perfect time for you too, to sit quietly and focus on the same point as your pet and see what you sense? Maybe your pet is your teacher. So interesting.

14. Do you have a familiar family whistle that sometimes you hear at random?

I do! It’s a very unique whistle that my Dad used to whistle. Every now and then, at the most random of places or at the most random of times, I hear it. It takes my breath away and brings tears to my eyes. That’s the power of connecting with your loved ones in spirit. You never know how they will contact you and what you expect or hope for is never what you get and what you get is always so much better. Incredible isn’t it?

15. Do you ever hear your loved ones favourite song right when you were thinking of them?

Quite often, I have found that at the most random of times, a song will start playing in between other songs on my playlist, a song that is not on the playlist and can never be found again after the song has played but is a song of great sentimental value reminding me of Mum and Dad and a song they always loved. We really love this when it happens don’t we and usually we find ourselves fighting tears. Have you ever experienced anything similar? 

16. Changes in temperature

In my experience: I have only felt this a few times myself and they certainly got my attention. Mostly, these have been times when my Team have tried to get my attention in other ways and I have been either ignoring it or not seeing their signs. So, if you get a hot flush or suddenly feel extremely cold, check in with yourself to see if the feelings are yours or your Team trying to get your attention.

 

If you have said ‘yes’ to at least one of the above, then I can with my hand on my heart tell you that ‘yes’ you ARE receiving signs from a loved one in spirit.

When you experience some of these, take a moment firstly to acknowledge and thank them and if the time suits you; invite them in to be with you again. Your loved ones in spirit are generally waiting to be welcomed in by you, they won’t just barge in to your life because they’ve actually learnt how that could affect you.

I’d love to know if you’ve experienced any of these signs yourself. Please leave a comment below and share your story. Your experience may bring comfort and hope to someone else who is reading this article.

A Final Thought to Remember

A note to remember: If you have lost a loved one and would really like them to make contact with you, start a conversation with them about it BEFORE they pass away or ‘go Home’ as we call it. Make sure that you both agree to very specific signs particular only to the both of you that no one else can know. Make the signs very specific so that when you see them you will no without doubt that you have just been contacted by them. 

Remember, it is also a choice made by your Loved One in Spirit to contact you. Being in a human body can be very heavy and if someone passed traumatically, they may indeed rest for a long time prior to learning the skill of contacting you.

If you are asking for a sign, be sure to make it very clear (especially before they pass away) about the type of sign you will know belongs to them only. (My friends and family know my sign and it won’t be BOO! That’s just a reflection of my humour.)

What I do know for myself with all of my experiences is that I cannot wait to get ‘home’ again to find out how they orchestrated all these experiences. I find them completely fascinating.

If you’d like to read more true stories like these, you’ll find many more throughout my books, Caught Between Two Worlds and Wired Not Weird. They are filled with real-life experiences from ordinary people who discovered there is so much more to life than we realise.